It took me long time to find Kelly and I had to go through quite a bit of heartache to get there. I really wanted to move on with my life right after I got home from my mission. The trouble was, I wasn't quite ready for Kelly.
After my mission, I ended up staying home for a few months and starting my education at Weber State University. I had quite a bit of exploring to do while at college. Luckily the course came through that focused my study early enough that made it so I didn't have to backtrack too much with my education. I sailed through Weber State and my undergraduate degree in a little over three years. During that time I dated a number of young ladies, a few of which I thought I was going to marry. For one reason or another, I was led away from them, even though they were great young ladies and could have been great spouses and mothers. This got to be quite frustrating.
I attended a ward for students while I was at Weber State University. I was given quite a few opportunities to serve in different areas in the church during this time. It gave me some great experience and understanding of how the organization of the church works. I also met some great lifelong friends - mostly mentors who have served to shape my life or as examples of how to live the gospel. I was also able to attend quite a few different institute classes that helped me to better understand the doctrines of the gospel. This opportunity to learn, study and practice the gospel with only the obligations of school and work were very beneficial to me and the shoring up the foundation of the person that I am today.
After I graduated from school, I was quite sure what to do next. I knew I needed to find a wife and start a family, but it wasn't like I hadn't been trying to do that. I found an excellent job for developing my skills as a graphic designer in the print industry. While it paid substantially less than most of my friends were making right out of college, it served as a place not only to develop those skills, but to watch another great mentor in my life in how he balanced work and family as well as ran the business. I worked for the print company for right around five years. I was given opportunities to take on various responsibilities throughout the shop and - though I had no title for it - I felt like I was the right hand man in the shop. This gave me a great understanding of the entire print industry and helped me understand my role as a designer in that industry. This has served me well as I moved on to other employment. While working at the print shop I also took on starting my own graphic design business. I noticed a gap in the wedding industry where people wanted custom wedding announcements and my boss gave me the opportunity to work doing these projects on the side while continuing to work in his shop. Having a design business on the side has also served my family well later in life.
These years after graduation all served to be quite frustrating. Not only did the frustration come from within from wanting to be married, it came from outside quite often as well. It seems like there are a few levels in life were the pressure to be married is heightened; after a mission is one and after graduating from college is another. While this was all going on, these years also served as a great spiritual training ground for me. I was given multiple other opportunities to serve in various leadership callings in the church.
After only a few months of being at home after my mission, I ended up moving into a house up near Weber State with a few friends of some of my friends. These young men ended up being some of the best friends I've had in my life. They are all great men and served as role models to me. They also helped me through numerous tough spots in my life. We were all in the same place in life, dealing with the same frustrations. While it was good to talk with a brother, sister, or parents on some of the frustrations I was dealing with, these young men became my confidants and help through many of my frustrating times during these years.
I continued to attend the student wards up at Weber State. I was able to serve with three different bishoprics during this time. After graduating there was a small change in how I felt about the student wards - I think they felt that way about me as well. I felt more like a caretaker or big brother to the students that were coming into the ward. I continued dating, but it wasn't really the same. I had a small group of friends, mostly my roommates that were all in the same boat as me and we all took on the role together. Our home was the place that the students in our ward would come for refuge. They'd come to hang out, but to feel like they were at home where someone could take care of them. We'd have big barbeques, parties, or just times to hang out and be together talking with people. Everyone was welcome at our home, even much to some of our dismay when we weren't home. There were quite a few issues with seven guys coming and going, keeping the doors locked and quite a few of our friends ended up just coming over and taking up residence even when we were gone.
During these years, I learned how to run a household and pay regular bills and ne responsible for payments that had to be on time. I learned to live in a neighborhood where I wasn't under my parent's responsibility. Some of those neighbors became great role models and still to this day, when I run into them in town or at the hospital, we catch up about how things are.
A few years after graduating and most of my good roommates getting married and moving out of our house of seven, I decided it was time to move on. I had a friend that lived at a different house that felt the same and we both started looking for homes around the University of Utah. He was considering pursuing a Master's degree and I had always wanted to do the same, so we looked there. The main reason we both discussed was that we needed a new social scene. We both were feeling the big brother mentality and were ready to move on.
My friend found a home a the top of the hills in Bountiful. This ended up being quite nice, because I was nervous about commuting to Layton from Salt Lake City on the budget I was on working at the print shop - especially when I knew rent would be higher in Salt Lake. The commute actually ended up being about the same as Salt Lake, because it took so long to get to the freeway from our home, but rent ended up being about the same as in Ogden because we lived in a home with five guys who shared the mortgage. We attended one of the student wards at the University of Utah.
The first week we attended our church meetings we took note of all of the activities going on that week and met quite a few people. My friend and I were both used to attending most every activity our wards put out there as we had both served in leadership responsibilities that required it. The first week we attended the Family Home Evening, which was a whole ward activity at the Church History Museum on temple square. When we got there I saw a few people I had met at church the day before and went to hang out with them. That whole night I enjoyed meeting all kinds of new people, some of which I knew would be good friends. Three of the people I met were the red-headed Register sisters - Kelly, Kayla and Katie. They were fun, social girls that I knew would become good friends.
We didn't hang out together very long at the museum as I attended to my social butterfly duties, but after the museum as we all decided to go and get ice cream somewhere and were leaving, we walked out together. I shouted to them across the way and we decided to drive together to the ice cream shop. We all played well together and had a great time. Katie even let me answer a phone call from a boy that she didn't really want to talk with anymore. We had a fun discussion about what we liked to do and the foods we liked that night and we made plans to go to yoga the next morning together and then to dinner the night after that.
There were only a few days after that that I haven't been with the Registers - and only a few days that I haven't spoken with Kelly; not by my choice. Kelly and I had a short courtship of four months and were married in the Salt Lake City temple. We knew we were going to get married after only a few weeks. We did have a few road blocks that we were able to work through in those four months, but everything worked out perfectly for us. While it was a few frustrating years preparing for Kelly, I wouldn't change it for anything. Kelly is a perfect match and spouse for me. She is an excellent mother for our children. She is a great friend and I love her.
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